Books by Dennis Fitzpatrick
THE 7 BASIC LIVING SKILLS
The first three living skills avoid divorce. The rest lead to bliss. Fitzpatrick maintains that any person who changes their own behavior by using the first two living skills of the 7 he teaches, can get the same results with difficult partners, children, parents, friends and coworkers if they are addiction free.
1. The Second Thought
2. Handling Conflict
3. Overcoming Addiction
4. The 5 Basic Needs
5. Forgiveness and Amends
Following is an explanation of the first three, and most important, Living Skills:
(Victim or Creator Behavior)
Basic Living Skill 1: The Second Thought: Victim or Creator
The victim thinker reacts. Impulsive thinking leads to impulsive acts which in turn creates an emotional reaction that affects our health. Creators stop and consider a second thought that might be more effective than the initial victim reaction. This first living skill teaches how we have less than a second to change our reaction. Therefore we must have the second thought ready ahead of time: I can handle this without blowing up or I can handle this without taking the first drink: or I can handle this without eating what I know is not good for me.
Before and After Marriage
So you think sexual appeal determined your choice of partner? Maybe it was a familiar brain type. What brain type is your partner? If you knew, could you understand your mate and even guide your children better? Could you know your capabilities better if you knew your own Brain Type? With a divorce rate at 50% or higher, could it be that we don’t know how to date, attract, screen or keep potential partners for a life time relationship?
Watch the following video on “Dating by Brain Type” (7:16)
Do you prefer a woman who is a live wire (like my wife)? She is constantly on stage and alive to the present moment. Then date brain types 5-8 or 13-16.
What if you want a man who thinks and plans ahead and doesn’t just think of today? Then date brain types 1-4 or 9-12.
Maybe you prefer a compassionate partner? A person who will be empathetic with you. Then date brain types 1, 2, 5, 6, 9, 10, 13 or 14.
Let’s say that you admire a person who is a deep thinker. One with which you can have interesting conversations. Then date brain types 3, 4, 7, 8, 11, 12, 15 or 16.
Maybe after your last marriage you decided that you did not want to marry a slob. You don’t want somebody who throws their clothes around but is neat and orderly. Then date brain types 1, 3, 5, 7, 9, 11, 13 or 15.
If you had a relationship with someone who was always criticizing and judging you and others, then you might prefer a creative right brained person. Then date brain types 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14 or 16.
Can we be more precise? Yes. Here are two from the master list of the brain types. Encircle the ones you would like to date:
#1 The People Person: An extravert that plans ahead who is also a feeling person that likes order in their lives.
#2 The Energetic Charmer: An extravert that plans ahead who is also a feeling and creative person. (From Chapter 1 of “Dating by Brain Type.”)
ARE YOU ADDICTED? IS HE? IS SHE?
41 Self-Evaluation Quizzes from Alcohol to Food to Worry
Addiction Definition: I know it is harmful but I do it anyway! Almost everyone eats foods they know are harmful. The addictions can be thought or substance addictions. At first they are mood altering, then harm relationships and finally affect health. A person changes when they self-evaluate.
Watch the following video on “Are You Addicted? Is He? Is She?” (5:04)